How to Support a Grieving Person
When a friend loses a loved one, you may feel immobilized because you do not know how to offer comfort or support. This is especially true if you have not yet lost a loved one. However, you can show support in many ways. You will be better prepared to help if you understand the grieving process.
There is no ideal way to grieve. People often grieve in unpredictable ways. Grieving may be full of sudden emotional changes. Bereaved people may seem fine one day but despondent the next day.
Loss can cause people to display extreme emotions and behaviors. In many cases, people feel angry or guilty when they lose someone, which may cause them to cry, yell, or snap at others. To help someone who is grieving, tell them it is normal to feel that way.
There is no schedule for grieving. Some people take months to recover, while others take years. Never pressure someone in grief to move on; let them recover in their own time.
As already mentioned, you may feel immobilized because you don’t know the ideal way to comfort a bereaved person. However, it could be very hurtful to that person. Therefore, never avoid a loved one who’s grieving. Texting or calling them alone can go a long way.
When people grieve, they may lose the motivation to do basic things for themselves. Therefore, you can offer practical help to lessen their burden. This may include taking them food, cleaning their house, walking their dog, helping with funeral arrangements, taking them to a movie, caring for their children, running errands, or doing their laundry. When offering support, do it wholeheartedly and cheerfully, so the bereaved will not feel they are asking you to do something you don’t want to do.
It is important to offer hope to grieving people. They need people who can offer them reassuring hope and tell them their sorrow is only temporal. These words can help them transition from immense pain to finding meaning in life again. However, be careful not to sound too insincere and shallow as it could make the bereaved person feel lonely and worsen their situation. One remark that can be immensely helpful is telling them to grieve as long as they need to but also reminding them they are strong and, as a result, will overcome the pain.
Also, don’t be frightened to bring up the subject of the departed person. People are often unsure whether or not to talk about the deceased. They think it may worsen the mood of the bereaved; however, that is unlikely to be the case. Talking about the departed can allow the bereaved to reminisce about them openly, even though it may come with a lot of tears.
To comfort a grieving person, it is best to listen more. Offer a sympathetic ear because the bereaved will benefit more from expressing their feelings than listening to others. A grieving person may tell a particular story several times to work through a trauma. Listen and express compassion to show that you understand how they are feeling.
Crying is an essential part of grieving and is the best way to express sadness. When people cry, the body releases oxytocin and endorphins, which ease emotional pain and reduce stress hormones. Therefore, you should not try to stop grieving people from crying. Offer them a handkerchief and give them a hug or a gentle pat to let them know they have someone who cares.
